pinched!

15 august 2007.

for the chinese, im very sure u've heard of the phrase "pun kui niam" (in hokkien), which means "pinched by ghost". hehe... for the superstitious ppl, it is so when u discovered that u have bruises that u kenot detect where or how it came from. hehe... meaning, the ghost pinched u la! haha...

and today i came home to find somewher on my left leg, a lil above my knee, one HUGE bruise! haha... as huge as one's thumbprint! haha... makes me wonder, wher and how i got it! lol...

(nah, im not one who is superstitious. just tat, i find it very funny! haha... )

my dear gigi

argh! the stupid aching nuisance from the 'mauk-keluar-tak-mauk-keluar' gigi of mine! nehh, the last 'big' gigi tat will only pop out after bothering u for some few months, and it seems to take forever to appear! stil not appearing gok, as of now... but i've had the on-and-off ache since i-cannot-rmbr-when! wanna grow new gigi, grow la! why make such big fuss abt it! hmmmph!

a fren said she had the baby-gigis 'plucked' out for rm350 per babe! my gudiness! its scary leh the way she described the 'surgery'! eeewwwww! and its the last gigi at the end of ur gum leh! meaning, they're gona force u to open ur mouth like a buayak lidat?! yerrr.... had a terrible experience with my primary-school dentist tat i can stil rmber vividly, til now. tats y.

but for now, mine's not that terible yet, just tat its kinda annoying! =<>

leaving...

cud rili use that pix now =( ... 13 august 2007, 1045pm.

js got back from a super 'slow' badminton game and dinner with my old pals. slow because i tink everyone was kinda energy-less due to empty stomach? haha.. but im used to it liau ler. owes hav dinner after game. but for me, kinda not very much into the game - maybe cos i just found out that one of my frens, MITE be leaving to work in another state! SHOCK THE BEJEEBERS OUTTA ME! he is the LEAST expected to leave, yet it mite just be!

funny thing is, evyone tot i WUD, but im here to stay... if im the one leaving to another place, i dun think anyone wud be surprised AT ALL! but not him! u wud NEVER have tot he wud! ha! its not that im sad that this fren of mine mite be leaving (i knew him since primary one, sitting cun cun opposite me, crying on the 1st day of pri 1 class, while i sat there kuai-kuaily looking at him-ALONE, without my mum! how can a boy be crying but not me, i wondered! and his mom was there ler! hahahaa... that's why he gets 'bullied' by us girls all the time now, u see! hahahaha... JK!)

ok, back to my point. not that im sad he is planning to leave. its a good thing if everything is better there. just tat, its very saddening to see ur frens, leaving one by one! ermm, if not mistaken, in june, a galpal left too. and another one leaving soon?? arghhh... rili made me sooooo... sad? the kakis are getting lesser month by month!

i gues life is like tat kua?? ppl come and ppl go. and then, ah... duno how to describe. hmmm... maybe partly its becos i KNOW for sure im staying. never gona be leaving. and evyone seems to be leaving. no good.. no good. if there's one more leaving, i tink the 'liquid' wud automatically generate from within my eyeballs! hahahahaha... (dun nid me to be sooo strait-to-the-point kua? haha...)

ahh, in short, everyone seems to be leaving... =(

*anwy, nvr rili thanked anyone for their 'bugs' actually. haha... but am glad to get a 'series' tonite. REALLY appreciate it. (replacement for a 'mail' that was never sent, i guess? hmmph... =P haha, jk! but thanx a lot, rili!)

oki. im leaving too..

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.

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to a 5 days' trip in 2 wiks' time! hahah... and leaving to get to my bed too. hehehe...

tomorrow can be too late

from a fwded mail oso. but very typical piece la this one... but then again, diff msg struck diff ppl @ diff situation @ diff time. maybe it'll be a 'reminder' for some ppl out there, who knows? anyway, happi reading...

If you're mad with someone, and nobody's there to fix the situation... you fix it.

Maybe today, that person still wants to be your friend. And if u don't, tomorrow can be too late .

If you're in love with somebody , but that person doesn't know... tell her/him.

Maybe today, that person is also in love with you . And if you don't say it, tomorrow can be too late .

if you still love a person who you think has forgotten you... tell her/him.

Maybe that person has always loved you. And if you don't tell her/him today , tomorrow can be too late.

If you need a hug of a friend... ask her/him for it.

Maybe they need it more than you do. And if you don't ask for it today, tomorrow can be too late.

If you really have friends who you appreciate... tell them. Maybe they appreciate you as well. And if you don't and they leave or go far away today , tomorrow can be too late.

If you love your parents and never had the chance to show them... do it . And if you don't and they leave today, tomorrow can be too late.

youth cup

went parkson with a close pal yesterday (sat) late aftnun, cun cun came face to face with the hunks from Chelsea's youth team!

never a fan of football, i din actually know which team they were... but i know they were all in jersey. haha... walkin from wad-on-earth-is-tat-name hotel to duno where!(hamik hotel liau? the one at tat building?) haha... nvm. no big deal. oki, continue - din know which team they were from, til i heard those lepaking kids shout Chelsea!

here for the Youth Cup, i guess?

and, like hitz.fm radio announcer said, "come and watch tomolo's star in action today!" =D

When You Divorce Me, Carry Me Out in Your Arms

from a fwded mail... VERY VERY THE LONG, but VERY VERY VERY VERY the touching (so much so it makes me wonder, is this kinda thing even possible?? hehe... but enjoy reading ya!)

On my wedding day, I carried my wife in my arms. The Bridal car stopped in front of our one-room flat. My buddies insisted that I carry her out of the car in my arms. So I carried her into our home. She was then plump and shy. I was a strong and happy bridegroom.

This was the scene ten years ago.

The following days were as simple as a cup of pure water: we had a kid; I went into business and tried to make more money. When the assets were steadily increasing, the affection between us seemed to ebb. She was a civil servant. Every morning we left home together and got home almost at the same time. Our kid was studying in a boarding school.

Our marriage life seemed to be enviably happy. But the calm life was more likely to be affected by unpredictable changes.

Dew came into my life.

It was a sunny day. I stood on a spacious balcony. Dew hugged me from behind. My heart once again was immersed in her stream of love. This was the apartment I bought for her.

Dew said, you are the kind of man who best draws girls' eyeballs. Her words suddenly reminded me of my wife. When we were just married, my wife said, Men like you, once successful, will be very attractive to girls.

Thinking of this, I became somewhat hesitant. I knew I had betrayed my wife. But I couldn't help doing so.

I moved Dew's hands aside and said you go to select some furniture, O.K.? I've got something to do in the company. Obviously she was unhappy, because I had promised to do it together with her. At the moment, the idea of divorce became clearer in my mind although it used to be something impossible to me.

However, I found it rather difficult to tell my wife about it. No matter how mildly I mentioned it to her, she would be deeply hurt.

Honestly, she was a good wife. Every evening she was busy preparing dinner. I was sitting in front of the TV. The dinner was ready soon. Then we watched TV together. Or, I was lounging before the computer, visualizing Dew's body. This was the means of my entertainment.

One day I said to her in a slightly joking way, suppose we divorce, what will you do? She stared at me for a few seconds without a word. Apparently she believed that divorce was something too far away from her. I couldn't imagine how she would react once she got to know I was serious.

When my wife went to my office, Dew had just stepped out. Almost all the staff looked at my wife with a sympathetic eye and tried to hide something while talking to her. She seemed to have got some hint. She gently smiled at my subordinates. But I read some hurt in her eyes.

Once again, Dew said to me, He Ning, divorce her, O.K.? Then we live together. I nodded. I knew I could not hesitate any more.

When my wife served the last dish, I held her hand. I've got something to tell you, I said. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes. Suddenly I didn't know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I was thinking.' I want a divorce'. I raised the serious topic calmly.

She didn't seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, why? I'm serious. I avoided her question. This so-called answer made her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man!

That night, we didn't talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer, because my heart had gone to Dew.

With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company. She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. I felt a pain in my heart. The woman who had been living ten years with me would become a stranger one day. But I could not take back what I had said.Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer.

Late that night, I came back home after entertaining my clients. I saw her writing something at the table. I fall asleep fast. When I woke up, I found she was still there. I turned over and was asleep again.

She brought up her divorce conditions: she didn't want anything from me, but I was supposed to give her one month s time before divorce, and in the month's time we must live as normal a life as possible. Her reason was simple: our son would finish his summer vacation a month later and she didn't want him to see our marriage was broken.She passed me the agreement she drafted, and then asked me, He Ning, do you still remember how I entered our bridal room on the wedding day? This question suddenly brought back all those wonderful memories to me. I nodded and said, I remember. You carried me in your arms, she continued, so, I have a requirement, that is, you carry me out in your arms on the day when we divorce. From now to the end of this month, you must carry me out from the bedroom to the door every morning.

I accepted with a smile. I knew she missed those sweet days and wished to end her marriage romantically.

I told Dew about my wife s divorce conditions. She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she does, she has to face the result of divorce, she said scornfully. Her words more or less made me feel uncomfortable.

My wife and I hadn't had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. We even treated each other as a stranger. So when I carried her out on the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mummy in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly, Let us start from today, don't tell our son. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside the door. She went to wait for a bus, I drove to the office.

On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest. We were so close that I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn't looked at this intimate woman carefully for a long time. I found she was not young any more. There were some fine wrinkles on her face.

On the third day, she whispered to me, the outside garden is being demolished. Be careful when you pass there.

On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I seemed to feel that we were still an intimate couple and I was holding my sweetheart in my arms. The visualization of Dew became vague.

On the fifth and sixth day, she kept reminding me something, such as, where she put the ironed shirts, I should be careful while cooking, etc. I nodded. The sense of intimacy was even stronger. I didn't tell Dew about this.

I felt it was easier to carry her. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger. I said to her, It seems not difficult to carry you now. She was picking her dresses. I was waiting to carry her out. She tried quite a few but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown bigger. I smiled. But I suddenly realized that it was because she was thinner that I could carry her more easily, not because I was stronger. I knew she had buried all the bitterness in her heart. Again, I felt a sense of pain. Subconsciously I reached out a hand to touch her head.

Our son came in at the moment. Dad, it's time to carry mum out. He said. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had been an essential part of his life. She gestured our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face because I was afraid I would change my mind at the last minute. I held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly, as if we came back to our wedding day. But her much lighter weight made me sad.

On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. She said, actually I hope you will hold me in your arms until we are old.

I held her tightly and said, both you and I didn't notice that our life lacked intimacy.

I jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my decision. I walked upstairs. Dew opened the door. I said to her, Sorry, Dew, I won't divorce. I'm serious.

She looked at me, astonished. The she touched my forehead. You got no fever. She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Dew, I said, I can only say sorry to you, I won't divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn't value the details of life, not because we didn't love each other any more. Now I understand that since I carried her into the home, she gave birth to our child, I am supposed to hold her until I am old. So I have to say sorry to you.

Dew seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove to the office.

When I passed the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet for my wife which was her favorite. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and wrote, ' I'll carry you out every morning until we are old'.

*nice eh? my sis must have known i'll SURELY post tis up in my blug, thats why she sent it to me! hahaha... but its a nice piece of story to read (all the more so when ur waiting for ur hair to dry! hahahaha... 1240am. im supposed to KUAI KUAI-ly go sleep earlier!) =P

cont' 33 Facts About Guys

someone was actually KIND ENUF to spare time 'lecturing' to me bout the p.o.v. with regards to this topic. (and like i said again, interestingly-informative, much more appetizing2d eyes... so it wasnt AT ALL a boring 'seminar'). hehe...

1. Guys don't actually look after good-looking girls. They prefer neat and presentable girls. (RILI?)

---> in short, they prefer girls who groom emselves! but it comes in a whole package of Looks + Personality, too! (and had me terrified - im not someone who does 'touching ups'! =/ eng eng!!).

2. Guys hate flirts.(AGAIN, RILI?)

---> din rili get the answer to this. actually, din get the answer at all YET!

4. Guys may be flirting around all day but before they go to sleep,they always think about the girl they truly care about. (THIS I RILI DO NOT KNOW. CAN SUCH THING BE?)

---> still owe me an answer to this!

6. Guys go crazy over a girl's smile. (...?)

---> totally forgot about this question! haha...

12. A guy would sacrifice his money for lunch just to get you a couple of roses. (DEPENDS ON HOW SWEET THE GUY IS OSO MAR... )

---> u know wad? they rili wud!

13. A guy often thinks about the girl who likes him. But this doesn't mean that the guy likes her.

---> miss tiau this Q oso.

23. A usual act that proves that the guy likes you is when he teases you. (HUH! IF THE OTHER WAY ROUND?)

---> forgot this Q oso. but dont bother answering this la - cos if its the other way round, its gona be FACTS ABOUT GIRLS. not guys liau. hehe...

27. Girls' height doesn't really matter to a guy but her weight does! (YERRRR... SO CHAM!)

---> it RILI does not matter lor! (but depends on every individuals too la).

ahh.... from wad i post here, seems like the answers are incomplete! hahaha... more unanswered than answered! apalah! fail lar this 'lecturer'! hahaha...

“message sent”

fri, August 10, 2007 (3pm)

aiksss! Wrong recipient! Aisi!!!!

gues that’s all you can do when you realized that the msg has been sent to the wrong person – aisi?!! Haha… anyone familiar with this kinda ‘accident’? I am! I am! Actually, happened to me twice in 2 days’ time. Haha… gud thing was, I'm not all the blurrie party nia – was the wrong recipient and also, the wrong sender.

Had me recall this Q, (one of my fav Q also) WHENEVER I GOT A WRONG MSG SENT TO ME, “you msgd the wrong person, or you tryin to kacau me?” haha… or like, another person puts it this way, “ke ke want to bug me hia?” (haha, yea rite! si ai bin! SOLI LOR TER-BUG TIOK U… hehe =P)

But then, the point is – that is so typical a feedback one will get! Haha… TYPICAL!!!

ah, NEVER fancied receiving msgs not meant for me! Not only it got you wondering blurriely, HUH?! for a moment, but sometimes, IT CAN BE REAL KEKOK LEH! So very the kekok! (can be soooo awkward til i'm angry! Me! The one RECEIVING the wrongly-sent sms!) Haha…

got a msg from a ‘lady’ once, MEANT TO BE FOR THE BOYBOY (who is now the hubby). APALAH! Read liau pun marah! Haha… sisua send msg! want to send wrongly also don't send to me lah this kinda (mushie) msg, tiok bor! Apalah! Hahaha… had me ‘kua kua jiao!’ angrily at this ‘lady’ for sending IT to me! Hmmmph! No more 2nd time! So awkward for me! Hahaha… ish! (you know who you are! Hahahaa).

But, like I said, I guess my name’s on top of her list kua? (was her confidante then, I guess? Just kidding!!) Haha… so people! Bukak mata besar besar before you send any msg! make sure its to the correct person! =P don't make other people kekok si. Haha…

(luckily, the ones I sent n received wrongly weren’t anything ‘unique’! hehe. Else, they’re going to make me ‘kua kua jiao’ gok liau! haha) (ignore the pin yin!)

YAY!!!! FINALLY! I'VE SUCCESSFULLY PLEADED FOR MY OFF-DAY TOMOLO! YAY!! (sounded sooooo kelian…) hahahah...

have a greaat weekend ahead, ppl. enjoy b4 the days SUDDENLY disappear and its monday again! hahaha...

dreamer of dreams

friday, 10.08.07, 1.15am

(from somewhere... cannot recall where tho)

"we are the music makers, and the dreamer of dreams..."

something to ponder...

"when you make a mistake, don't look back at it long. take the reason of the thing into your mind and then look forward. mistakes are lessons of wisdom. the past cannot be changed. the future is yet in your power."

Hugh White

"it hurts to find out that what you wanted doesn't match what you dreamed it would be" Randy K. Milholland

"to be brave is to love someone unconditionally, without expecting anything in return. to just give. that takes courage, because we don't want to fall on our faces or leave ourselves open to hurt." Madonna

"the greatest mistake in life that you can make is to be continually fearing you will make one" Elbert Hubbard